Hi Dreamer and welcome back to the blog!
This week I will share some truth with you: the truth about emigration.
What does it feel like to close a whole chapter, or better say a whole book of your life and start somewhere new?
To leave all your stuff behind and start over with nothing but a suitcase and a plane ticket?
The truth is that making your dream reality isn’t always a dream. Sometimes it is more like a nightmare.
All the things you didn’t want to happen, they happen
Everything you’ve worked for, it is gone – you give it up to chase something new.
For me, starting my life over meant saying goodbye to a few things, but mostly my freedom – at least for the time being.
Why do I feel like I gave up my freedom?
The reason I feel like I lost my freedom is because of the fact that I can’t really look after myself at the moment.
I quit my accountancy job, which included a car, laptop, phone and a great salary for a job with neither of these.
Missing out on these extra’s means a limit in my freedom, therefore I feel captured.
Sometimes I feel like I can’t move, unless someone helps me move.
Is losing your freedom a bad thing?
It is part of the process of building up a new life. Back to basic is something that has to be done in order to achieve other things, but sometimes is does get frustrating.
I mean, you’ve worked so hard to take care of yourself and to be independent
And here I am, in a different country and depending on every person that comes near me
I don’t have my own car, I don’t have a lot of money to spare, because the visa-process takes up most, I don’t have my freedom
What doesn’t help me is that I find it hard to ask people for help – I’ve always wanted to be able to take care of myself and do me
Maybe I am a bit of a lonely wolf and just want to do whatever I feel like – that’s what I had gotten used to
Concert? I’ll drive myself
Weekend trip? I’ll book a flight
But at the moment these things are not the reality I live in
The few steps back in order to go forward are becoming real to me and I am starting to realise what they mean
No car to go where I please
No salary to buy me whatever I want
Not the freedom I was used to
And maybe I was a bit spoilt and don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining – not even close.
I am so lucky with my current situation, having a family on this side of the world who looks after me and helps me, even without asking.
I have a job that allows me to at least save so I can work my way to where I want to be.
I have a car that takes me to where I need to go
And I have a beautiful home with people that help me with everything
Even though I sometimes wish I didn’t need the help, I am so happy that I do have the people around me to offer it.
It gives me a bit of freedom
A bit of luxury
And most of all, the help is what will get me where I want to go, it will give me enough freedom – at least until I can stand on my own again.
Because if it wasn’t for all my helpers, driving me around, keeping my head up and telling me it will be okay, I would’ve gone crazy
Even a lonely wolf loves a pack for time to time
And even a peoples person loves to spend time by themselves
It is give and take
And most of all appreciating what you have
Even if it isn’t what you want yet – You’ll get there
But don’t forget to enjoy the now – That’s all you got
Work for your dream, while living your dream
Enjoy the moment, while working for more
And don’t decline the help of others, you don’t have to do everything alone!
Lots of love,