Sometimes I find myself wondering, what does it mean to be independent? And why does it feel like an insult when someone makes you feel like you’re not?
Am I independent?
Before moving to Australia I used to hear a lot that I was independent. I lived on my own, had my own car and used to travel by myself a fair bit. However moving to a different country and starting over somehow got rid of that status. I barely ever get told I am independent or barely ever feel like I am. And I guess it’s strange in a way. Even though I moved by myself, with my own discipline and courage, I have needed help. Not to babysit me or hold my hand, but to start a new life. I needed help settling down, getting used to a new culture and building up my financial and social life again.
But the question is, does that make me less independent? Does that mean I am not my own person anymore?
Sometimes it does make me feel like I’m not. And this can be bad for my self-confidence. For me ‘being independent’ has always been a great quality to have. All I ever wanted in life was to be able to support myself and do what I want. And to be honest, when I really think about it, I have done an amazing job at this.
I followed my dream, did the work to make it reality. And to make it reality I had to sacrifice things. My own place, my current job and my friends and family were all left behind when I moved. I had to start from scratch and create new things for this. Find a new home, a new job and a new friend circle.
Today’s look on independency
4 years later I live in a beautiful home, have a job and amazing friends and family to share this with. You would say I succeeded. But I have had help. I have had my boyfriend and his family help me set myself up. I have had an amazing gym to help with my social life.
To me that doesn’t make me less independent. It makes me a very lucky human being. To have a dream, to put in the work to make it reality and to have met people along the way who supported me in doing that.
The support of these people have made my dream come true. It doesn’t mean I lost my independency, it means I allowed for them to join in on my life, while I am being independent.
And isn’t there anything more beautiful than sharing your dream with others?
I am proud
I am strong
And I am independent